Eventually
by PrettyPurpleHaze
Summary: Important Author's Note Added! AU Fic. A look into the life of JJ and Roxanne if, on Christmas, she thought of who was the nicest person she could ask for advice. How would that affect the years? . . . Starts in the episode where JJ heads off to college.
1. Upset

Title: Eventually  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own them, I just screw with the characters. Puppet master, muhahahaha . . . ha.  
  
Rating: Currently PG-13  
  
Summary: AU Fic. A look into the life of JJ and Roxanne if, on Christmas, she thought of who was the nicest person she could ask for advice. How would that affect their life? . . . Starts in the episode where JJ heads off to college.  
  
Author's Note: Someone please write some JJ/Rox fics. I had to resort to making them myself! And it's not very good, blah. I might delete it, but, for now, enjoy.  
  
**  
  
"We couldn't," he whispered, tracing her hand lightly. His fingertips felt the tiniest bit heavy on her skin, and it lulled her enough to believe this moment would last forever.  
  
"I know," she confesses with a lilting smile in her tone. "I was just . . . saying it."  
  
Roxanne moved closer to JJ's body heat, enjoying the usual after-mix of warmth and moistness that was almost too hot as she felt him skin to skin. But she wanted that, she wanted his essence to burn into the flesh of her ribcage, chest, cheek, any spot that touched him. She wanted to remember him all the better, memorizing the way he touched her, spoke against her skin, and laid next her, so she could think of him when the days ran headlong into nights and she couldn't see him anymore.  
  
He was leaving soon.  
  
She'd been feeling that brunt of pain all week, the thick collection of that ache like lead in her stomach.  
  
"I want to go to college first, have a career," he told her as his fingers traveled from her hand, up her arms, into her hair and back again. "I want everything to be perfect before I marry you."  
  
"If I let you marry me," she said flippantly, recanting her first suggestion as she rose on one arm to look down on him, a grin firmly in place.  
  
"If you let me," he echoed with a brief nod of humorous sentiment. She slid down onto his chest and her Cheshire cat smile fell from her face and her fingers slid into his rumpled hair, feeling the slick treatment he used.  
  
"It's hard to know you're leaving. I wouldn't care if you stayed right next to me, right here, and never went to college. You're a good man, JJ, and a lot of people aren't, you're a better person than anyone and that's the most important thing." She sighed miserably as she continued, tilting her head. "But you DO care, so I care too . . . I'm going to miss you."  
  
He gathered a handful of her dark, messy tresses to gather and flow between his fingers like so many times before. He concentrated on the soft touch of it and he watched the color contrast against his skin, it was a beautiful shade that matched the enigmatic eyes he loved so much.  
  
"You'll see me. You can drive up for every game, and I'll be home for holidays, and phone calls, and letters. Do you really think *I* could stay away from *you*?"  
  
"It's not enough," she hushed pitifully, rubbing his chest in short strokes.  
  
"It'll never be enough. We're always around each other now and that's not enough."  
  
She laughed softly and buried the bottom half of her face in her arm. "You're right."  
  
His eyes looked left, to the tiny clock at Roxanne's bedside in her empty home. It was late, or maybe it was early. It wasn't until their relationship began that Roxanne didn't resent the late shifts her mother took on. The hands of the timepiece glinted faintly in the dim light of the moon that still shone - it was time to go. Four-thirty, enough time to dress and say goodbye to his family.  
  
"We better leave."  
  
When she looked at him she was crying and he pulled her closer. Wrapping his arms around her in a comforting cocoon as he brought her to lay next to him and have a few more moments together in her dark. He was so busy trying to comfort her he barely noticed the sickening ache in his own stomach . . . he was going to miss her.  
  
**  
  
They approached the house slowly, stopping as JJ spied his father already stepping outside. When Jack saw Roxanne he gave a restrained nod and headed toward his son. She ran a self-conscious hand through her hair to make certain it was in place. She knew JJ had said he was spending one last night with 'the boys' before picking Roxanne up for an early morning goodbye.  
  
Jack was opposed to the relationship; worried when it was new that JJ would be too involved in the sweet beginning filled with good harmony. Later, he worried when the new wore off and it was obvious their feelings were stronger, he worried the most on the family vacation when they came in the cabin after sneaking out hours before, disheveled and rumpled.  
  
That was the night they lost their virginity, and they were sent to their separate places to sleep with a suspicious eye. When they woke the next morning not another word was spoken about it, but from bits of things that JJ gleaned from ensuing conversations between his parents, his father was worried and his mother chastised him for being silly. It was that Rox was so young, he had said, and JJ could be so attached - Helen argued that was exactly the reason nothing happened. The two of them knew the consequences and how short their time was before JJ would be gone. If they did, they never considered it, just appreciated what they had.  
  
Afterwards, JJ and Rox found it wise never to mention the trip again and avoided alluding to times when Jack would know they'd be alone - save the understandably evident dates out.  
  
"Ready?" Jack asked, clapping his son's shoulder. He was proud, and it poured from him, his evasive attitude toward Roxanne even dissolved then when he emotionally congratulated his son.  
  
"Almost," JJ answered, feeling his own pride at his father's joy. He always knew he was going to go to college, and that he was going to play ball. It was a priority instilled in him by a hopeful father. No, perhaps Jack never had hope, he simply *knew* it would happen.  
  
"Let's get those boxes together then."  
  
At his father's request JJ linked hands with Roxanne, bringing her with him. When they met the warm interior Rox gently tugged her hand away, and at JJ's questioning look she just nodded him on while she stayed in the kitchen. She wanted to go with him, but seeing him pack away his life in so many cardboard boxes and prepare to leave made the lead in her stomach seem heavier.  
  
Helen came to her side and both of them smiled gently at one another, sharing a common moment of stress on a joyous occasion. The older woman patted her shoulder and led her over to the table with a waiting cup of tea. Meg came down to her own cup and when she saw Roxanne her expression fell even more so with the open reminder that her brother was here only to pack and go again.  
  
They sipped their drinks as the two oldest Pryor men came through the kitchen. Helen looked at both of the young women seated with her and took in their morose expressions before setting her cup down.  
  
"It's silly of us to be so sad, isn't it? This is something wonderful," Helen encouraged through a partially put on smile. Her first baby was leaving, and although he was old enough, it felt like yesterday when he was tugging on her skirt, begging her to make pudding.  
  
Joyous. Meg and Roxanne tried to remind themselves of that fact as they cupped their tea. Patty and Will joined them when it seemed like the last of JJ's things were being brought down. Will's loss was written across his face and he stuck close to Patty as they all made their way outside.  
  
They lined up in front of JJ and Jack, who was looking on as his son slid the last of the containers inside the car. They spoke softly and Jack clapped his son's back again before his eyes strayed over to the group before him. He approached with a gentle quirk of his lips. Patty groused about the weather and JJ lightly informed her of how much she was going to miss him.  
  
Her sarcastic responses dried up on her tongue when he gave her his jacket. She hugged it around her and her face brightened more than when she won first prize at her last winning spelling bee. It felt special to have the East Catholic red around her shoulders. Will still hadn't given even the slightest smile yet and JJ crouched down to his level. His pudgy face looked on sorrowfully, he'd already been treated to one night without his roommate, and with so many more to come, he wasn't remotely eager about having the room to himself. There was an ultimate security wrapped into the room that rarely seemed cramped, JJ was big and brave . . . and his protector. When JJ mentioned that the space was now solely Will's it dragged to light what he was going to be missing now. Even promises of comics did little to lift his spirits.  
  
Meg was already tearing when he came to her. He quoted 'The Wizard of Oz' to make her smile and she complied. Why did college seem so far away? The tears didn't stop, but her eyes brightened a little at his efforts. His mother didn't fair much better. She was proud of him, going on to the next step in life, making his way in the world. But such words are hard for a mother to take to heart when her first child leaves, and now was no different.  
  
Finally, Roxanne stood quietly. Crying had made her eyes shine so brightly that they were beautiful in that bittersweet way. He took her hand and led her away slightly, leaning in to kiss her cheek. She closed her eyes at the pressure on her skin and JJ tasted the watery tracks there.  
  
"I love you," he whispered into her ear as he cupped her cheek.  
  
"I love you."  
  
"I'll see you soon. We'll be together before you know it."  
  
She nodded, closing her eyes and then looking to his. "Just a bump in the road."  
  
"I've got to do this if I'm going to marry you, right?" he joked gently.  
  
"The offer still stands," she returned with a smile. Seeing her brighten made him feel better, his eyes fell to her lips and then his mouth followed suit. He kissed her softly, a soft goodbye and a nod to the more passionate, heated kisses they'd shared in the hours before.  
  
"Remember the good stuff."  
  
He stepped away, holding her hand a moment longer before the link broke and he met the car. He waved a farewell and got inside, letting himself give in to the excitement he felt. In the passenger seat he felt it mix with the trepidation, sinking into him with the ache that was there earlier. The car roared to life and he leaned out, waving once more, as they drove off. When he pulled himself in there was just enough time to catch a glimpse of everyone in the rearview mirror.  
  
He focused on Roxanne at the very end and tried to keep the image perfect in his mind.  
  
Behind the disappearing car, Meg reached out to grasp her best friend's hand in comfort. She got a grateful, watery smile in return and they both headed inside. They hadn't been hanging out much anymore, since JJ and Rox had become a couple and Meg had been steadily gravitating to another group until it had ended badly in a misunderstanding, but they needed each other now.  
  
Rox looked in the distance. She needed a cigarette and she needed one now.  
  
Remember the good times . . .  
  
She could always remember Christmas . . .  
  
**  
  
December 24  
  
10:07 PM  
  
"Hi."  
  
JJ looked up in surprise, "Hi."  
  
They were paused on the sidewalk, the snow was falling again, frosting the air and making their breath come out in great plumes of vapor. Their hands were stuffed in their pockets, and though JJ didn't move, Roxanne shifted a little as the cold air caressed her legs.  
  
"I . . . I was looking for you," Rox confessed, awkward in her reveal. It *was* awkward, it wasn't as if she normally milled around in the winter, doors down from the Pryor's so they wouldn't know she was there while she waited for their son to get home from wherever he was. She was embarrassed, and she didn't know what to do about the anger and hurt she felt because her mother had to work tonight - maybe she was embarrassed *because* she didn't know what to do. She needed someone who would be honest, but not harsh . . .  
  
"Why?" JJ asked, his brow furrowing slightly. She shuffled her feet, looking down at them with a smile that was almost embarrassed before laughing into the cold.  
  
"Because you're the nicest person I know."  
  
He didn't know how to respond so he laughed a little from the side. "Thanks. Do you have a moral dilemma?"  
  
He meant it as a joke, but . . .  
  
"Everyday," she answered plainly. "But you can help me with this one now."  
  
"Come on, I'll drive you home."  
  
It was an open invitation and she took it, walking astride him in the cold air to the passenger door. He opened it kindly and she greeted the interior with a slight sigh of relief. It was still moderately warm from when he'd exited moments before and she was freezing after waiting close to fifteen minutes. He came round and climbed inside himself, starting up the car.  
  
After a slight pause, he backed out and they were heading down the street. Rox looked over, burrowed a little deeper in her coat, and spoke. "I'm going to be alone tonight."  
  
He didn't respond, just let the minute's stretch until she picked it up again.  
  
"I wouldn't normally just blurt that out," she sighed. "You know that, but . . . That's part of the problem. My mother is working late and . . . every year we're supposed to get really dressed up and have this great dinner. It hasn't happened yet . . . I even lied about it to Michael."  
  
"The Bandstand guy?" JJ clarified, remembering his sister's mentions.  
  
"Yeah," Roxanne said absently. "I lied during the holiday, or maybe I implied. Either way I hope it doesn't count as a sin."  
  
JJ smiled and took a turn as she went on.  
  
"So, feeling like the worst person - and feeling like I had the right to be the worst person - I need an outsider's opinion. Meg has her own problems with Luke," Roxanne continued as JJ nodded. He knew of his little sister's crushes even if she didn't tell, it was always written on her face. "I was going to go to see Michael again, but . . . I tried to think of the most good hearted person that I know and . . . that's you."  
  
JJ glanced over and shook his head. "I'm not that good, Rox."  
  
She looked over at his with humor in her features. "You're an angel, JJ."  
  
He laughed and gripped the wheel as the snow fell against the headlights. She chattered on and on, even after they'd pulled up to the building, after he opened her door, and all the way until they stood of her front stoop and she was still speaking in great puffs of foggy air. She stepped up on the first stone slab and turned to look at JJ.  
  
"I miss her, a lot. Sometimes, though, it feels like she doesn't even think of me, but if that was true she wouldn't be working on Christmas just to support me . . ." She looked up, the creeping thought that he should be elsewhere came to mind. A tinge could have covered her cheeks, but they were already pink from the cold and couldn't revel anything. "I'm sorry for keeping you from your family."  
  
"It's okay. After all, what good am I if I'm not a roving problem solver?" he grinned.  
  
She laughed softly. "So what do I do?  
  
"I listened to you all this time. I think you know. Family's important, Rox."  
  
She nodded quietly. "There's my answer?"  
  
"It's the best I can do. I can probably come up with something else if you want," he humored with a red smile.  
  
She shook her head. "No. It's perfect. Thanks . . . JJ . . . You know I don't think you're just a roving problem solver, right?"  
  
"I know," he assured her taking her icy hand that had come out of her pocket and was hanging at her side. The corner of her mouth lifted and she leaned in.  
  
"Thanks, JJ."  
  
She kissed him then, light and friendly on his cheek, feeling the cold skin on her equally cooled mouth. When she pulled back, everything had changed. She wasn't quite sure what had happened, but she hadn't pulled away far enough, and his breath was fanning across her face. It took her a moment to realize she was doing the same and his eyes had focused on her so intensely she felt flush.  
  
How could everything click - just like that? How could . . .  
  
She took a chance, like she so often did. She leaned in and kissed his mouth, hardly a drop of pressure exerting itself until Rox knew he wouldn't pull away. It intensified then and suddenly she wasn't so cold anymore, the heat from his mouth warming lips and upping her temperature. At the last moment, she felt the wet warmth of his tongue sweep across her the bottom of her mouth before she pulled away.  
  
JJ's mind raced, thoughts went through at breakneck speed: Beth, and Colleen. Colleen who he'd seen an hour ago, who he didn't want to kiss like this because he was thinking of Beth. He didn't think about her now. All thoughts faded at Rox's dilated gaze on his and the question of how his hands had come to tangle in her hair was still a mystery.  
  
He pulled back and cleared his throat, trying to focus on not slipping on the slightly icy sidewalk.  
  
It was the beginning of it all.  
  
**  
  
JJ smiled at the memory as he looked up at the ceiling of his dorm.  
  
Football practice had been tough, but no tougher that he'd anticipated. It was the dull ache in his ankle that bothered him, slight at first, but he'd run on it all summer with no repercussions. He didn't want to worry about it, and thinking of Roxanne helped that.  
  
"Oh. There's no way you could get someone like this," Allegheny announced, snapping the photograph off of the wall. He wasn't an easy person to like, Allegheny, and they'd crossed paths before - East Catholic had been crushed under the opposing team. JJ sat up and looked across to his other - far less annoying - roommate trying to get a look.  
  
From the picture, he and Roxanne smiled up from the comfortable position reclining in the sand with her back against his chest. They'd taken it the during the last vacation at the beach, that night they'd snuck away and slipped into the boathouse among the tarps and the old beaten vessels that couldn't be used anymore. He blinked away the vision, not wanting to think about it just then with his roommates milling around.  
  
"Hey. I know this girl . Yeah, yeah, from 'Bandstand.' I saw her dancing on there." He flicked the picture up to show his point and both his bunkmates shared a laugh.  
  
"She's on there with my sister, Meg," JJ said, snapping the picture away when he got close.  
  
"There are those Pryor reflexes," a voice provided as Allegheny leaned on the bunk.  
  
"You're sister is Meg? I've seen her too," he smirked obnoxiously. JJ ignored the obvious attempt to rile him and returned the picture to it's rightful spot. "Unbelievable. Only you'd have that luck Pryor, on and off the field."  
  
"The field has nothing to do with luck," JJ said. "That's hard work."  
  
"And the girl?"  
  
". . . I did have luck there."  
  
**  
  
She rolled over, her limbs heavy and craving sleep. It was her mind that wouldn't calm down. She'd talked to JJ yesterday, but she felt sick with the summer humidity and the distance between them. Her mother had been home for dinner tonight and had looked at her, silently fretting over peas and bread.  
  
Eventually Roxanne broke first and asked what was the matter. Her mother had laid it out plainly.  
  
JJ.  
  
Her lovesick daughter slunk around the house and only smiled when she was on television. It worried her and she had no trouble telling Rox that. She could still hear her mother's firm statement echoing in her ears . . .  
  
'It was all right at first, but you two are becoming too close now. He's just a boy, Roxanne. A boy that isn't even here any more, and if you're smart you'll get over him sooner rather than later - before you wait for phone calls that never come.'  
  
Rox shifted, the fabric of her gown uncomfortable against her sweat-damp skin.  
  
The phone calls did come. Her mother was wrong. She loved JJ, and he told her the same . . .  
  
Memories of her parents' marriage ran through her mind. They hadn't loved each other, Roxanne was sure of that. In fact, she was almost certain they'd only stayed together because her mother got pregnant. All their torn relationship resulted in was her birth, years of arguing, the loss of her father, and the embittered platitudes of her mother.  
  
She shook away the depressing thoughts and turned in her bed, hugging the cooler side of a pillow and closing her eyes tightly. She'd worry about everything later, now she would try to sleep, and think of better things . . . and people her mother wouldn't approve of.  
  
**  
  
He crumpled up a shirt and stuffed it into a small corner of the suitcase. It was finished, his career, his education . . . he hadn't even called home yet. It was the shame that dug deep, it made him into a coward, shunning the telephone and resisting the urge to put together a gentle way to deliver the news. He didn't want to deliver the news. He wasn't going to college; his father would have to accept that.  
  
Maybe he was unrealistic, but everything seemed to crack around him, the façade failing just like his bum ankle.  
  
"Pryor."  
  
He turned to see one of his . . . former teammates, Ryan, standing in the doorway. He looked away, back to his bag. "Yeah?"  
  
"The, uh, coach wants to see you," Ryan said. Another sad look, another regrettable apology, the Coach would probably even pat him on the shoulder and say he wished it that things would have gone another way.  
  
JJ could see it now, and it still wouldn't be the last sorry looked he'd received at his failure.  
  
But it was probably the last one he could take.  
  
**  
  
He spoke on the phone quietly, his tone lighter than she was used to.  
  
"I know I said all that stuff, but . . ."  
  
"Are you sure?" Roxanne asked. Her tongue was thick in her mouth with a ready answer she wanted to spit out, but she had to hold back, after everything he said . . .  
  
"I love you, and we've talked about it a couple times. You always said . . ." It almost twisted his heart to say the next words. His father would be so disappointed. "You always said you didn't care if I went to college."  
  
And she didn't, not like Beth who constantly spoke of it, or like anyone else around him who drove him on. He didn't resent the pressure people like his father brought on him, often he thrived on it, but it always felt good to be accepted for just himself. Not his 'potential.'  
  
He felt a little lost now, everything was slipping away and the only thing that made anything better was the thought of Roxanne. He couldn't even select the phone number to a home he'd lived all his life in without a wash of shame coming over him, but he could slide his fingertips over and pick her digits out instinctively. This had to be right.  
  
"Marry me, Roxanne."  
  
She felt giddy and conflicted at once, but her cheeks grew red and her smile blossomed. Biting her lip didn't prevent the answer from finally finding it's freedom and when she spoke it was sharp and loud.  
  
"Yes!"  
  
He smiled in relief, leaning his head against the pay phone and sending up silent thanks that she was willing to have him.  
  
. 


	2. Coming Back

Chapter 2  
  
"Still not talking to me?" JJ asked with a half-smile that was anything but happy. This was the fourth call home, and his father still refused to speak to him.  
  
Helen sighed over the phone. "JJ, it's just . . . you could have told us. It was horrible the way he had to find out. Roxanne's mother was hysterical when she called about the note she found . . ."  
  
She didn't want to ask if *everything* on that short letter was true, and he wasn't ready to tell anyway.  
  
"I'm sorry," JJ winced. He berated himself for going that way.  
  
"He told her she had to be mistaken . . . when he called the University to confirm . . ."  
  
"I just . . . couldn't face him."  
  
"You should have tired."  
  
"I did, a million times," he responded, picking at the threadbare bedspread that belonged to the cheap motel.  
  
"Just come home," his mother said softly. "We miss you."  
  
JJ looked at the blue and pink, square, cotton pattern. "I will. Soon."  
  
"It's been four days."  
  
"Soon," he repeated. "I love you, Mom."  
  
"I love you, sweetie."  
  
"Tell Dad I'm sorry," he finished, setting the phone into its cradle. He heard three decided thunks as the sound of flowing water cut off and he scooted back to lean on the headboard. His eyes were drawn to the bathroom door, open just a crack, letting steam out. A moment later it swung open all the way and Roxanne strode out, a smile fixed on her face, and a towel wrapped tightly around her. His face brightened at her entry and she kneeled on the semi-comfortable mattress, walking on her knees across until she sat next to him.  
  
Her husband.  
  
"How did the call go?"  
  
"Just as well as the last three."  
  
She frowned a little and laid a wet hand on his stomach. He grasped her wrist, holding it as he pulled up the fabric of his undershirt and returned it. He always wanted to feel her skin to skin now, the closer the better. He seemed needy, and she didn't mind taking care of him.  
  
"Now you see why I haven't called my mother," she said quietly. She looked up at him and saw the distress etched in his face. At least *he* was trying, and it was killing him. "I'm sorry."  
  
"Me too."  
  
"Do you regret it?" she asked, looking down at the band that encircled her finger. He reached for it, touching the cheap gold ring that matched his own.  
  
"No."  
  
She smiled and leaned forward, kissing him for the millionth time since he pulled up outside of her building at 3:07 in the morning. She didn't recognize the car at first; it was beaten and rusted. He grinned and told her that he'd gotten a good deal on it. Although it was a 1954 Plymouth Savoy, it looked like it had set somewhere for twenty years, and the 'For Sale' sign was still sitting beside him on the seat. But it ran, and it ran well - Surprisingly. It only sputtered and staled once or twice. They drove all night, heading south. When the sun rose they stopped for a while, pulling behind a restaurant where they made love in the back seat before going inside for breakfast.  
  
They kept going until they stumbled across a small chapel just over the border of Mississippi. It took twenty minutes to get a marriage certificate, seven minutes for the ceremony, and then . . . they were wed. They didn't think much about money until afterwards. It was a fifty-dollar ceremony - with the rings, and witness in the form of the organ player, included. Whether it was the usual fee or Minister Coragee saw them coming a mile away, they didn't know.  
  
Once in the car they figured out what they had left. JJ managed to hold nearly one hundred dollars, most of which his father had given him for necessities. Roxanne added her thirty-two bucks and seventy-two cents - birthday money, and the best she could gather quickly.  
  
Could they start a new life off on $ 125.72?  
  
Sure.  
  
They headed back up back to Philidepha without intentions of stopping. But they felt good, close, happy. They pulled into Jumpin' Jingle Motel and hadn't left since, except for something to eat. Now they were still there, in the room furnished by a bed, a desk, a chair, and two lamps - it was good enough for them.  
  
JJ's hands lifted to cup the back of her head and Roxanne sighed into his mouth, moving to sit on his lap. He sat up, lifting his undershirt off as she pushed it away to rake her nails on his hot flesh. He broke away his fevered kisses, going to her neck, his lips haltingly sliding over her wet skin.  
  
"I love you," he whispered, reaching for the tuck in the hotel towel.  
  
"I love you," she answered breathlessly, feeling the cool air hit bare skin.  
  
**  
  
When the door opened Roxanne saw her mother dissolve into tears. She reached out, pulling her daughter from JJ's side and enveloping her in a tight hug. The older woman shook against her and Roxanne patted her back with one hand, her other was still holding JJ's grip like a vise.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant?" she sobbed. "You didn't have to do THIS!"  
  
"I . . ." Roxanne moved back a little to look into her mother's face. "I'm not pregnant."  
  
"But then why?"  
  
"Because I love him."  
  
Her mother's focus shot to JJ who stood quietly. Her eyes were so much like Roxanne, but JJ had never seen the fire and hate reflected like that. It made them completely unlike Rox's.  
  
"How could you do this to my daughter!" she demanded.  
  
"He didn't do anything!" Roxanne defended, stepping back to her husband.  
  
"Don't you move!" Mrs. Bojarski ordered, tugging Rox back. "You are staying here, YOU ARE LEAVING!"  
  
Her sharp gaze was on JJ, but Rox shook her head and tugged her arm away. "He's my husband, and I'm leaving with him."  
  
"You . . . You did it?" Sally choked. The note was simple; Rox couldn't find another way to say things -  
  
Mom. I'm leaving for a while with JJ. I love him, and he loves me. We're going to get married. I love you, too. Please don't be mad. Rox.  
  
"Yes," Roxanne answered.  
  
"Mrs--"  
  
"NO! DON'T SPEAK TO ME!"  
  
JJ took a breath and tried again, he wanted her to know what he felt. "I love your daughter."  
  
"Until someone else comes along?!" she spat angrily.  
  
"NO!" JJ defended.  
  
"I've been through this!" the older woman said with tears in her eyes. "I know the ending! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO HER?! HOW COULD YOU FALL FOR HIS LINES?! YOU'RE ONLY SIXTEEN!"  
  
She was yelling at them both now, shaking her head in disappointment.  
  
"Mom-"  
  
"You are getting an annulment."  
  
"NO!" Roxanne shouted. "I will not!"  
  
Her mother staggered at the strength in her words. She rose a hand to her heart.  
  
"Then get out."  
  
". . . I--"  
  
"OUT!" she screamed so loudly that her voice drew raw. "I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN! GET OUT!"  
  
Roxanne broke down, fat tears rolling down her face as she backed through the doorway. She opened her mouth to say something, but snapped it shut again as she stumbled into the hallway with JJ behind her, holding her up.  
  
"DON'T CALL ME, DON'T COME HERE AGAIN!" Sally yelled venomously as she slammed the door shut. Roxanne started to gulp for air as the tears came in a torrent and her mother continued to loudly blast them from inside the apartment.  
  
They made it down to the battered car and Rox climbed inside as JJ went around to climb in the driver's side window since the door recently refused to open. Roxanne collapsed against him as soon as he slid towards her. They stayed there for a long time as he whispered promises of everything being okay, as sobs racked her body.  
  
**  
  
When they pulled up to the Pryor home she just looked over listlessly and breathed out an unsteady sigh. JJ peered at the house carefully, guarded, it was guarded, and he was guarded. He didn't want to go in. He reached across the seat and held Roxanne's hand. He needed her there, but if she couldn't . . .  
  
"You don't have to," he said quietly. "After . . ."  
  
"No," she said firmly, trying to draw strength from within her. "We'll do this together."  
  
He nodded shortly and dropped her hand briefly. He tried to open the door, but it stuck stubbornly. He glanced over at Rox to show his frustration and climbed out. He opened her door when he came round and she stepped out, reaching for him again. They were a united front, they were going to stick together in this, they were married. And they wanted to be.  
  
JJ's legs felt weak, Roxanne was more than a little displaced after her squabble with her mother. Hearing words she never thought she would fly from her mouth. But she wasn't going to budge.  
  
JJ almost faltered. He didn't know if he should knock, or walk in. In the end, he didn't decide.  
  
The door flew open and Patty stood there, her eyes half-shocked, half- accusing. "What are you doing here? Dad's going to kill you!"  
  
The couple didn't have time to react as Helen flew out from the kitchen, rushing them. She threw her arms around her eldest son and squeezed tightly. "Oh, JJ, we were so worried about you. Where have you BEEN?!"  
  
"Down South," he said, clearing his throat slightly. Helen looked to his side, seeing Roxanne, peaked and withdrawn.  
  
"Roxanne? Dear?"  
  
"What were you THINKING?!" Jack's voice exploded through the room as he approached, Patty, Will, and Meg following in quick succession.  
  
"Dad, I-"  
  
"You've RUINED your life," he berated. His eyes scanned Roxanne morosely taking in the situation and shook his head. "The both of you."  
  
"We didn't-"  
  
"Is she pregnant?"  
  
"JACK!" Helen broke in.  
  
"Is she?" the older man questioned.  
  
"No," Roxanne said, finally speaking. "I'm not pregnant."  
  
Jack was visible relived, closing his eyes and exhaling before he opened his piercing eyes again. "Then *why*?"  
  
"We love each other," JJ answered shortly.  
  
"You don't know what love IS!" his father corrected. "You thought you loved Beth! How is this different!?"  
  
Roxanne shrunk back for just a moment as Meg watched, worry etched in her face to the very roots of her blonde hair. Rox seemed to come back though. She would be strong. She just was, and she needed that feeling now more than ever.  
  
"I love Roxanne, it's not infatuation," JJ explained firmly.  
  
"And are you sure she loves you?" Jack asked, turning his questions to Roxanne. "Tell me, how many boys have you be in *love* with?"  
  
"Dad," Meg breathed.  
  
He said it so snidely that no one had ever thought he'd possessed that kind of voice. It was spelling out that she was a slut. Helen put her hand on his arm, she knew he was angry, but she didn't want him to damage his relationship with his eldest son permanently.  
  
"No one else," Roxanne said with such a deep fire in her gaze she could have burned him alive if she saw fit.  
  
"Enough," JJ intervened, pulling Rox close. "We love each other, and . . ."  
  
"Don't say it," Jack ordered, although he'd hinted at it. Helen's eyes darted down and, unintentionally or not, she couldn't see their ring fingers. Jack didn't even glance, he didn't want to know if the note Rox left was true, he didn't want to know that -  
  
"We're married."  
  
"God," his mother said, covering her heart and closing her eyes. Even if this was expected, it seemed like a shock. "Meg, take Patty and Will upstairs."  
  
She did so reluctantly, tugging her siblings by the arms as her eyes locked on the argument until she got upstairs and pushed them off so she could linger at the top step.  
  
"How could you?" Jack said again, much more quietly than before. "You've thrown everything away."  
  
"Like what?!" JJ said, losing his composure. "A bad ankle and an education I couldn't AFFORD?!"  
  
"We could have worked something out!" his father pledged.  
  
"No. There was no way."  
  
"So you get MARRIED?! That's supposed to solve everything!?"  
  
"No. It's supposed to make me HAPPY."  
  
"And everyone else miserable?" Jack countered.  
  
"It's MY life."  
  
"No, son, you're wrong - it's BOTH of your lives now."  
  
"That's right," JJ agreed, holding up their clasped hands briefly.  
  
His father shook his head in disappointment. "You'll get no help here. You wanted to do this, you deal with it. Live with Roxanne and her mother."  
  
"Actually," Rox said in a precariously steady voice, "I've just been thrown out of my house, so I guess we're on our own."  
  
Helen looked at her husband with worry, but he seemed unshaken.  
  
"It seems so." It was his only, simple answer.  
  
The newly joined couple turned, there was nothing left to say.  
  
When they met the car Rox got in, sinking down into the seat. JJ went around and tried his door - still stuck. He grunted, swearing as he kicked it in frustration, the banging in choppy secession. He beat it until his foot ached and then he slumped against it. Rox looked over, worry for JJ drowning her. She reached out, her right hand grabbing his shirt through the open window in an effort of comfort. She stroked the cotton material, then under it on his bare skin, calming him down.  
  
He had Roxanne.  
  
She was all he needed.  
  
**  
  
"What do we do now?" Roxanne asked quietly. They sat in the back of the horrible car that seemed thirty years old rather than ten. Besides three suitcases, the clothes they wore and the things JJ had dumped in the trunk in a mess because the cardboard boxes wouldn't fit, the clunker they sat in was the only other thing they owned. They had driven around for hours, mostly in silence, stopping only for gas until JJ finally pulled over. As soon as the car stopped Rox climbed over the front seat and settled in back. JJ followed.  
  
They touched just barely now, only their arms rested against each other. She felt drained, and JJ could see it on her. Her skin was pale in the wash of the streetlight as it came through the back window. He breathed deeply and turned straight ahead, staring past the front seat and through the windshield.  
  
"I'm not sure what to do yet. Don't worry," he said.  
  
She looked over, her eyes a little dull, she didn't move to put an arm around him or comfort him. She just stared ahead as well. "I'm not worried."  
  
Even though she hadn't moved, her simple statement made him feel better. Stronger. Rox was his wife and, even if his father threw his out, he was going to keep the lessons he learned growing up - take care of your family. He had to get a hotel.  
  
He moved to climb into the front seat again, but she caught his sleeve.  
  
"Don't."  
  
"It's getting late," he told her, watching the shadows fall on her. "We need a room."  
  
"I just need to be here with you." He looked at her, the first soft smile coming out since they met Philly. "If you hadn't noticed, it's been a long day."  
  
He sagged back into the seat and she moved to him, lying against his chest. With Roxanne over him the pain in his heart still stayed, the loss of his father's respect, regard . . . everything, it was still there. But it eased, maybe just a little, but she made everything easier.  
  
She'd lost everything too. He looked down at her and found her staring right back at him. She traced his face with her fingers, every curve under her fingers made her relax against him even more. He was beautiful right now, he was all she had, and, somehow, that was all that mattered. That she had him.  
  
"I'll take care of you," he vowed. He would be strong enough for both of them, he had to, he loved her, and that was his place now. Everything was for Roxanne. He would tell her over and over again so she would feel better. "I'll take care of everything."  
  
Even if all he wanted right now was for someone to take care of him.  
  
"No," she said, making herself comfortable against him, patting his chest. "I'll take care of you."  
  
And she knew what he wanted.  
  
TBC.. 


	3. Finding a Place

Chapter Three  
  
Morning was an atrocious wake-up call, the sun was too hot, the car was too stuffy, and Roxanne was achy from being curled up on the seat. She sat up, moaning at the cricks in her body and looked over at JJ, who was surely in a worse state - he'd spent the night in a sitting position with her crammed against him. It had made his face mash into dirty glass, with just enough of a tilt to allow drool to escape and make an unsightly trail down the dusty window.  
  
He jerked awake to Roxanne laughing.  
  
"What is it?" he asked in a sleepy mumble, rubbing his cheek, smearing dirt into a darker smudge. She wrinkled her nose and rubbed her hands together, feeling grimy.  
  
"I can't believe we did it back here," she observed, remembering the morning after they'd started on the road.  
  
JJ looked around and shrugged. "We managed to put that dress under us."  
  
She smiled at his attempt to go along with the lightness - after the drama of yesterday, it was what they needed, and wanted. She reached to the front seat, grabbing an over shirt and rubbing the side of JJ's dirty face.  
  
"We need a place to stay, or a car wash."  
  
"I think I came up with something when you fell asleep - and wedged me into the corner."  
  
"Sorry," she impishly grinned, moving close to him and giving a quick kiss.  
  
"The roof would have been preferable," he continued.  
  
"I said sorry," she defended with a poorly hid smile. "Trying to make me feel guilty?"  
  
"If all I get is that tiny peck on the lips."  
  
"I need a shower," she informed him, brushing back her hair from the mussed ponytail.  
  
"I don't mind."  
  
"Where on a residential street, I don't think these families want to wake up to a rocking car," she countered. "Now tell me the what you came up with last night."  
  
He looked clueless for a moment before shaking his head. "Right. Dave. His father owns a few apartment buildings, and I was going to call him, see if we could set up something."  
  
"Our own place?" Rox asked excitedly. She leaped into him; "This is so wild."  
  
"I aim to please," he answered, happy with her exuberance. "But first we have to get out of this backseat and make it to a payphone."  
  
Rox pulled away and climbed into the front seat with JJ behind her. He tried to start the car; it sputtered and didn't respond. He tried again as Rox pulled at the clothes she was wearing feeling uncomfortable.  
  
"I know I said no rocking cars, but do you think they'd mind someone changing here?" she joked.  
  
"I don't know about them," JJ said with a grin. "But it would make my morning better."  
  
With that the car roared to life and they headed for a payphone.  
  
**  
  
JJ hung up the phone and shot a look to Rox, who seemed decidedly fresher after her trip to the gas station restroom.  
  
"Can he do it?"  
  
"He's going to meet his father for lunch and we can call him back around two," JJ informed her. "The plus side is that Mr. Higgin's always liked me - and money. The downside is he shops at Dad's store everyone once in a while and if they talk before we do I don't know what that will mean."  
  
Rox sighed and leaned against the wall. "Maybe we can use the car wash for us. If my mother didn't have off on Thursday's I would sneak us inside to clean up."  
  
She sighed miserably, inadvertently remembering the things her mother said. He looked at her, shifting in her clean clothes, but not looking comfortable.  
  
"I'll call Dave back." And he did, but Dave had left already, and Mike wasn't home, and anyone he could think of was on vacation. He watched her carefully as the phone just rang and rang.  
  
He didn't think he could do it, but Rox didn't look happy, and he wanted her happy.  
  
Hanging up the phone he picked up his dime again and cleared his throat. When Rox heard his request her head whipped to him in surprise.  
  
**  
  
"Come on," he told Roxanne as they jogged up to the back entrance. Meg opened the door, ushering them inside with haste.  
  
"Hurry!" Meg whispered harshly though there was no need. "Dad's going to kill me if he finds out."  
  
"He won't find out," JJ assured her. "How long do we have?"  
  
"Mom said she'd be finished with errands by eleven, but she promised Patty they'd look at the new school supplies, and Will wanted to go. You have until eleven-thirty because she'll definitely be back to make lunch. Dad's coming home to eat today," she said in a hush.  
  
"We'll be out of here before then," he answered. They had two hours; it would be plenty of time. Meg led them up the stairs and JJ went to the linen closet to pluck a few towels.  
  
"How are you guys doing?" Meg asked with a pitch of worry.  
  
"Fine after a shower. Thanks, Meg," Rox said with a smile. She really was her best friend. She'd never had another friend who would have risked life and limb to the likes of Jack Pryor.  
  
JJ handed Rox a towel; "You can go first."  
  
"Thank you!" she said in a sigh as she clutched her clothes to her chest and headed into the bathroom.  
  
JJ looked over at Meg, worry etched in her features. "We'll be fast."  
  
"You know it's not that," his sister answered. "You spent the night in the car, JJ."  
  
"We're okay."  
  
"Please tell me you aren't just trying to make me feel better," she answered. She didn't wait for his reply, just went to the bathroom door, tapping it slightly and hearing her friend respond before entering.  
  
Rox was already in the shower, reveling in the feel of it. Meg picked up the clothes she'd thrown on the floor and tossed them on top of the sink before taking a seat on the closed-lid toilet.  
  
"Do you feel any different?" she called.  
  
Rox paused under the spray, shrugging her shoulders behind the blue curtain. "A little."  
  
Meg let out a chuckle. "I feel different. I mean, come on, Rox, two weeks ago we were on the phone talking about being juniors and now . . ."  
  
"Everything's changed," Roxanne finished. She reached for the shampoo and began to soap up her hair. "I can't . . . It wasn't how we meant to do it. JJ was going to go to college, and he was going to work for a few years before we even got engaged."  
  
"You had a plan?" Meg asked.  
  
Roxanne smirked as she rinsed her hair. "Yeah."  
  
"You've only been together," she paused, thinking of the time. "Six months!"  
  
"Actually," Rox said, just loud enough to hear over the water. "We were together by mid-January, we just didn't want to say anything."  
  
"ROX!"  
  
"I'm sorry!" she said, sticking her head out. "But you knew soon after. It's not like I could hide something from you anyway!"  
  
"You could," Meg sighed. "We really didn't talk that much lately . . . or for a while."  
  
"I know," Rox said tucking her wet hair behind her ear. "I should have noticed more, been angry less."  
  
"You had your own stuff going on," Meg shrugged. "And I wanted to be popular."  
  
A bark of laughter came from them both at Meg's honesty and Roxanne ducked back inside the shower. Meg looked at the tiny, decorative clock and chewed her lip.  
  
"I'm going to check on JJ."  
  
"I'll be another minute," Rox called as Meg left the bathroom.  
  
Meg headed down the hallway, peeking in what used to be JJ and Will's room. Not finding him she headed downstairs, but stopped when she heard noise in her parent's bedroom. For a split second she worried, but it was quelled just as briefly and she chastised herself for being on edge.  
  
She opened the cracked door and saw JJ staring at the tall bureau her father used. On top were assorted photographs in frames. Meg stepped in quietly, though it was obvious she entered, she didn't want to disturb him.  
  
"Think he's ever going to forgive me?"  
  
"Sure," Meg answered immediately, knowing that it was what he wanted to hear. JJ smirked slightly.  
  
"I don't think so."  
  
"Hey, when the first kid comes along he's sure to soften up," she cracked.  
  
"No," JJ said, shaking his head.  
  
"JJ?" Rox asked, interrupting. He looked over and smiled gently, nodding and moving past them to use the bathroom.  
  
Roxanne watched him go, then looked at Meg.  
  
"He looks bad," Meg said.  
  
"He's in surprisingly good shape, better than me. He's in 'take charge' mode. You know how he does that when he has a problem."  
  
"Everyone else is more important," she agreed. She shifted a little. "What did your mother say?"  
  
Roxanne smiled sadly. "Get out. That she's disappointed in me. That I ruined my life."  
  
"Do you think so?"  
  
Roxanne was quiet, mulling over the question a few seconds before she answered. "What do parents know? Granted, it wasn't *ideal*, but . . . We love each other. It's more than I can say for my parents."  
  
Meg's eyes searched the hall briefly before she shifted. "I don't think you can come back to Bandstand. You missed a lot of days, and I told them you were sick."  
  
"Thanks," she said quietly. "I thought you'd do that, I haven't exactly thought about what to tell them."  
  
She still wanted to be on the show, and she was optimistic enough to fool herself into thinking that she had a slim chance.  
  
"I . . . I think they called your mother. But from what I heard, she just hung up on them. Michael was going to stop over, he was worried."  
  
Roxanne smiled widely. "I get married and, finally, my crush from last year cares."  
  
Meg let out a laugh at Roxanne's exaggerated sigh. "Those are the breaks."  
  
**  
  
They were lucky, Mr. Higgin's didn't see Jack Pryor lately. Didn't have a chance to ruin the opportunity Rox and JJ had to rent from the boisterous man.  
  
As horrid as that rental was.  
  
Rox sat on a stool that had been left by the previous tenants and scanned the room. The price was what you would expect to pay in a place as run down as this, if they were going to live in squalor at least they would pay appropriate prices. There was a kitchenette, surprisingly well kept though it wasn't clean by any means. Then there was the bedroom, which was also the sitting room, den, living room, and if they stacked some books in the corner they could call it the library too. Just two little rooms.  
  
But it came with a bed, two nights in the car was enough to make them crave a mattress, and it wasn't too shabby either. It *was* shabby - just not too much. It folded out from the wall, and when it was up, a framed, glass-free picture of flowers hung there securely, supposedly as a distraction, but it didn't really hide the visible seams in the wall.  
  
It wasn't horrible in some ways, but even if their bathroom was a communal one they had to share with the whole floor, and was located behind a door at the end of the hallway - it was their place. They would live here together, with no one to tell them what to do and where to go, and for Rox, it sounded heavenly.  
  
JJ came in with Dave, each carrying a box. It had taken them a while to clear JJ's things out of the trunk after they found some boxes, but they were finally finished. Roxanne stood to greet them with a smile.  
  
"Didn't I tell you I would do it?" Dave asked with a grand smile.  
  
"You said you would *try*," JJ corrected. "But you did, and thank you, a lot. We really needed a place."  
  
Dave dropped the box and looked at the couple. "Looks like we won't have to go to the high school reunion to find out who got married right out of school. I can't believe you guys did it."  
  
"We did," JJ affirmed, dropping the box and leaning on the counter. "Now it's more about where do we go from here?"  
  
"Good question," Rox said, leaning next to him.  
  
Dave shook his head, and looked to his watch. "I have to go. But I'll stop by later this week."  
  
"Thanks again," Rox said warmly, and JJ reached out to shake his friend's hand. After he left JJ looked around.  
  
"What do you think?"  
  
"It's private," she smiled. "No rocking car."  
  
"A definite plus," he nodded, reaching for her and kissing her lips.  
  
"I didn't think we would get it this early, but you were right, Mr. Higgin's did like you. All you did was talk to him on the phone after Dave mentioned it."  
  
"I'm a charmer," he teased.  
  
"I know," she affirmed, holding him closer.  
  
"Now we have to figure out what to do . . . What about school?"  
  
Roxanne released him and turned to explore the kitchen. "I won't go anymore."  
  
"NO."  
  
He said it so firmly she spun around to face him. "Why?"  
  
"Because they expect us to fail, Roxanne. We can't."  
  
She eyed him for a moment and nodded. "You're right."  
  
"And I have to get a job."  
  
Rox grew quiet at that, she wanted to volunteer herself, but something held her back.  
  
"What is it?" JJ asked as she hushed up. She looked over, and he knew by her expression. "You have a . . . job."  
  
"Kinda," she shrugged. "I guess I did."  
  
She sighed and fingered the dusty countertop.  
  
"Rox?"  
  
"Do you think . . ."  
  
"I . . . don't think so."  
  
She nodded slowly, trying to resign herself to it. She hadn't mentioned her hope until now. She loved dancing on television; Bandstand was part of the things that made her happy and satisfied. She laughed a little morose laugh.  
  
"I guess they don't want a married woman on the show." A tear moved down her face with that, then another, and another. JJ went to her, putting his arms around her.  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
"It's okay," she said through a sniffle. "It's not the only thing I had."  
  
JJ bit his tongue. She did have more, because of him, it was gone now. He thought back to last night, another spent in car. All the things that leaked into his mind as he held her close. All the things she would be missing because of the life they had now. She hugged him tightly and he held her while regret settled in him, they were here now, in this little apartment, with hardly any money, and hardly any inclination that things would be better.  
  
He shouldn't have done this to her.  
  
** 


	4. Starting Off Stumbling

Chapter 4  
  
JJ came in, falling onto the bed, glad Roxanne hadn't bothered to put it up today. He was tired and dirty now that he was working for a moving company: Boddy's. They were a popular company because they would take care of anything, the finest antiques, lumber, furniture or old equipment that needed to be taken to the dump. Today it was broken wood - large, filthy, splintering slabs from a renovated house that needed to be carted away. With the amount of refuse, JJ thought it was a wonder that the house was still standing.  
  
He knew he needed a shower, but Stanley Redop of apartment 7-C was always hogging to communal bathroom and was probably in there now. JJ groaned, slumping half onto the floor and yawning into the cover that matched the sheets, and pillow case that his mother had sewn his name into - when she thought he was going to be at college, and didn't want his things mixed up with his roommate's.  
  
He talked to her weekly for the past two months from the phone booth down the street since they didn't have a phone. Quiet calls his father probably knew about, but didn't comment on. He'd seen his father only once since the day after their 'honeymoon'. Jack had been going into the shop. JJ bit his lip, then pushed himself into calling out.  
  
His father looked his way, said nothing, and went inside.  
  
Meg was the only family member he regularly saw, she was always dropping by, and she and Roxanne had grown close again. This ensured that, even when JJ was dead tired, he still had to wait until his wife and sister had discussed ever minuet thing under the sun. Only then was it that Meg was ready to go and he had to drive her home to avoid her taking a night bus in such a neighborhood.  
  
His thoughts broke away when the door opened. Roxanne came in wearily. Her feet hurt from walking home, and her head hurt from the speech she'd received while getting escorted to the door.  
  
"Hey," JJ said, reaching a hand out. She usually came and sat next to him, today she turned and put her purse on the counter. "What's wrong."  
  
She looked away, staring hard at the tiny, dim kitchen. "I was fired."  
  
"Again?!"  
  
She turned completely away from him and he adjusted his tone, pushing back his dirty hair before speaking.  
  
"Rox. This is the second one."  
  
The first had been her stint as a waitress, and he hadn't blamed her for being fired. Her temper was quick when offended, and when someone reached out and grabbed her behind a plate of burgers and fries scalding his lap was one of the more merciful things that could have happened. Currently she'd been shampooing heads in Rita's Salon.  
  
"I grabbed the wrong bottle and gave a graying fifty-year-old woman orange hair," she said quietly. When she looked back at JJ she had a faint smile. He just rubbed his temples. She meandered over to him and sat down. "We'll be okay."  
  
He snorted out an unhappy laugh. "Least one of us thinks so."  
  
"JJ--"  
  
"You're starting school next week, you need a bunch of stuff. You don't even have a notebook."  
  
"I have a pencil," she said brightly. "I took it from the diner."  
  
"This isn't funny," he stated through an emerging grin.  
  
"Then why are you smiling?" she asked cheekily, leaning over to him, and then pulling back when he went to kiss her. "You're all dirty."  
  
"A couple dollars worth," he said, pulling himself up and going into the kitchen. He opened the refrigerator door, but was faced only with a carton of eggs, a few bottles of Coke and a ridiculously large block of butter Rox had taken from the diner after uttering the immortal phrase, 'Fine, fire me! I quit anyway! And I'm taking this butter!'  
  
He smirked, remember her spirited retelling as he reached for a drink. "What are we going to do?"  
  
She sighed, sliding up onto the bed. "I don't know. We have thirty-four dollars in the cookie jar, and I can find something else. It's a big city."  
  
"Yeah," he said, leaning onto the counter. The room was almost silent before the knock on the door sounded, followed quickly by Meg, beaming and bogged down with bags.  
  
"Hi," Rox greeted brightly, bouncing up from the bed. JJ just tilted his bottle in greeting; his mind was full of the troubles they were encountering. While Roxanne could usually look ahead to a more optimistic situation JJ felt, as the man, he had to carry it all.  
  
"Guess what?" Meg said excitedly, dropping her things and grabbing Rox's hands.  
  
"I don't really have to guess, do I?"  
  
"Not today," she said with a shake of her head. She was already dipping down; blindly digging until something sprung from the sack.  
  
"It's beautiful!" Roxanne announced, reaching out to finger the green shade of the sweater.  
  
"And yours," Meg nodded proudly.  
  
"Really," she grinned, thinking it was a 'saw it and thought of you' type of gift. "That's so nice of you, Meg."  
  
"Don't thank me just yet," she recommended with a firm nod. Reaching down once more she took up three of the four bags, shaking them out onto the bed. There were three blouses, two sweaters, and four skirts, along with a few intimate articles. "These are all yours."  
  
JJ had come round at that, looking at the clothes. "From where?"  
  
His voice was quiet, and Rox knew it wasn't a good sign.  
  
"Mom," Meg said happily.  
  
" . . . Take it back."  
  
"What?" Roxanne asked, her eyes darting to her new clothing.  
  
He looked at her, regret crossing his features before he became stern. "We can't accept this. We can't take anything from them, we'll do it ourselves."  
  
"It's not from them!" Meg protested. "It's from Mom. Dad would drop if he knew she did this."  
  
"You were just saying we had no money for school supplies!" Rox reminded.  
  
"Got them!" Meg said quickly, grabbing the forth bag and dumping out notebooks and pens among other things.  
  
JJ looked at them, silent for a moment before shaking his head. "No."  
  
"JJ!"  
  
He turned to Rox, the sound of his name as she said it was filled with . . . longing. She wanted the clothes; to her it wasn't a matter of pride.  
  
"What if your mother walked in and offered us something? How would you feel?"  
  
"Happy!" she countered. He grunted and went back to the teeny kitchen, grabbing his Coke. Rox spun on heel and charged up to him. "JJ, your mother is trying to be nice! You might not accept help - but accept NICE!"  
  
She did know it was pride.  
  
He looked at them, went over to a pile of his clothes, digging though them until he found something suitable and clean. "Keep them if you want."  
  
He opened the door and strode out of the apartment, letting the door slam behind him. Roxanne sighed and looked at the outfits morosely.  
  
"I can't take them."  
  
"Come on, Rox! He's being silly."  
  
"But he's my husband, Meg. I can't do something that's going to kill him," she said, plunking down on the bed. "My mother said I was too young to be married - and I'm too young to be a widow."  
  
Meg laughed and sat next to her, picking at a brown and green plaid skirt. "This would look great on you."  
  
"I know. But I can't," she said quietly. Then her eyes began to brighten, and a smile began to form. "It was nice of your mother to make me a loan."  
  
"A loan?"  
  
"Yes," Roxanne answered, standing and heading into the kitchen. She pulled down the chipped cookie jar they'd found in a closet along with some pots. She retrieved a five-dollar bill and waved it at Meg.  
  
"No. Mom's not going to want it."  
  
"Please," Rox pleaded. "If we're paying it back . . . it's not sucking the pride out of him."  
  
Meg sighed and took the money. "I don't know."  
  
"Take it. And if she tries to give it back just take it and buy something for yourself."  
  
"Fine," Meg agreed. "But if I get to keep it . . . where's the rest?"  
  
Rox smiled at her friend's effort to make light and shrugged. "When I get another job I'll give you some more."  
  
Meg's face fell at that. "You got fired again?"  
  
Rox nodded.  
  
"How?"  
  
"I turned a fifty-year-old woman into a clown. I grabbed the wrong bottle and turned her hair an unflattering shade."  
  
"Like?"  
  
"Orange," she grinned cheekily.  
  
By the time JJ got back he was clean, and in a better mood. The fact that there had been hot water to spare helped considerably. When he got walked in, he saw two looks of contentment.  
  
That meant something.  
  
"What?"  
  
"We figured it out," Roxanne helpfully supplied. He was willing to listen.  
  
"And?"  
  
"And we'll pay your mother back, five dollars a week."  
  
"How much was all this stuff together?" JJ asked. He didn't care. He was just putting in one last protest. He wanted her to have these things, and he wanted to keep his pride like he was taught. He did.  
  
**  
  
They dropped Meg off half a block away from the house so that Jack wouldn't give her speeches or lectures for associating with them. JJ wasn't sure if he would, after all, they were siblings, and deserved to see each other. But just in case . . .  
  
They stopped off at the grocery store and spent the better part of the cookie jar money. All that was left now was money for gas, and not a dollar more. By the time they returned home and put away the food, they were tired and lagging. Rox had no more stepped out of the kitchen before she was shedding her clothes.  
  
She fell onto the bed with a groan. It'd been a long day and she was ready for some sleep. She didn't even bother to put on a gown before she crawled beneath the covers; she didn't often get a chance to wear one anyway. JJ watched her flutter her eyelids as he took off his shirt; he reached for his toothbrush to begin to scrub up. Rox's eyelids lifted at she saw her husband brushing away, something she forgot.  
  
With a moan she pulled herself out of bed, thankful the air was still warm and kind to her bra and panty clad body. Reaching for her own brush she did a slow job of cleaning her teeth while JJ made his way to the bed, doffing his own clothes as he went. He awaited her approach as he watched her drooping features, and even her yawn with a mouth full of paste didn't waver his gaze.  
  
Finally, after an unladylike spit and rinse in the sink she came over, crawling in and plopping on her stomach. She was happy. She savored the soft bed under her. She shifted to the perfect position.  
  
She felt him kiss her shoulder.  
  
"JJ," she moaned. She didn't want tempted, she wanted to sleep.  
  
"Rox," he whispered. She felt his hand smoothing it's way up her back and she turned slightly into his touch.  
  
"I'm goin' to sleep."  
  
"You sure?" he asked, and she almost cursed the smirk in his voice. He kissed her shoulder again, moving closer, the warmth of his form making her moan in frustration at the feelings he was evoking. She turned on her back; her eyes still sealed as his lips trailed over her collarbone.  
  
"We can't anyway," she yawned.  
  
"Why not?" he asked, running his fingers over her belly and ribs.  
  
"Because," she shifted, "We didn't have enough money left for rubbers."  
  
His lips stopped his head lifted. "What?"  
  
She finally opened her eyes, looking over. "We used the last one yesterday. And we didn't have enough money today."  
  
" . . . There are other ways," he said with a slight smile.  
  
"What other ways?" she asked as he curled his hand around her hip.  
  
He grinned and kissed her again.  
  
**  
  
JJ woke up unpleasantly. His head rose from his pillow, feeling disoriented for a moment until he looked toward the kitchen. Rox stood in one of his button down shirts; she glared at him and banged the frying pan onto the stove. Last night came back and JJ sighed, dropping his head onto the pillow.  
  
She pulled out a carton of eggs, nearly dropping them onto the counter and perhaps cracking a few. JJ groaned into the bed and pulled himself up, rubbing his hair as he reached for his underwear. He pulled them on and walked to the counter, staring across at his wife.  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
"You promised!"  
  
"Roxanne--"  
  
"You promised!" she repeated.  
  
"I know, I know," he said looking at the counter before shaking his head and looking at her. "But . . . it was . . . I was in the moment and it was hard to remember right then."  
  
"It's two words, JJ! Pull. Out. Pull out. PULL OUT. Two words!" she shouted, throwing the eggs into the pan, then grunting when she realized she forgot the butter.  
  
"You didn't say anything!"  
  
"I said 'wait!' I'm sorry I wasn't loud enough, but maybe you were too busy to notice!"  
  
"You were happy before that!"  
  
"It wasn't an issue before that!" Roxanne said, annoyed and scraping out burned egg. "Besides, weren't you the one that said we have to be careful?"  
  
"I wasn't thinking!"  
  
"I know," she answered, coming round and picking out clothes. She went to the door, peeking out to make sure the bathroom was open and made a running start to it.  
  
JJ looked at the burned pan and fell back onto the bed. He still had to go to work.  
  
**  
  
"Pryor residence."  
  
"Patty," Roxanne said in relief, glad Mr. Pryor didn't pick up.  
  
"Yeah?" the voice on the phone asked.  
  
"This is Roxanne."  
  
"Boy, are you lucky Dad's at work."  
  
"Is Meg there?"  
  
"How's JJ?"  
  
"Fine. Can you put Meg on?"  
  
"Geez. That's the last time I try and be nice." Rox heard the phone drop and Patty yelling in the background. After a moment she heard a panting Meg on the line.  
  
"Rox?"  
  
"Meg. I need you to ask your mother some questions."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because," Rox answered impatiently, "Now would NOT be the time to consult my mother."  
  
"What is it?"  
  
Roxanne bit her lip. "First question: How many times can you have sex before you get pregnant?"  
  
"You don't know that?"  
  
"You do?" Rox shot back.  
  
"Well, no, but . . . you're married."  
  
"They don't hand out a booklet with the ring, Meg."  
  
Her friend was silent for a moment. "Anything else?"  
  
"No. I don't know. I can't . . . my mind is a blank."  
  
"Is JJ around?" She wondered if he was as worried as Rox sounded.  
  
"No. He left for work. With eggshells in his breakfast," she sighed, leaning against the booth. "You have to ask, Meg."  
  
"Why don't you? She's home."  
  
"I can't ask her that."  
  
"You have to."  
  
Rox looked up and down the street, the people unaware of her problems. "Fine!"  
  
"Tell me the answer," Meg said, before dropping the phone. Rox growled into the receiver and kicked the glass.  
  
**  
  
"Pryor! WATCH OUT!" his boss shouted.  
  
JJ stopped before stepping too close to a staircase. He shifted, moving another way to set the mahogany cabinet against the wall, and let out a breath of relief he didn't tumble down the stairs.  
  
"You take a break," Mr. Harbor said, pointing to JJ. "Get your head right."  
  
"Yes, Sir," JJ answered, wiping perspiration from his brow with a gloved hand. The two other movers, Freddy and Michael, headed for the truck and the ten other pieces that had to be brought in.  
  
The boss was right, he needed a break, he'd been thinking of Roxanne all day. She was upset with him, and although his excuse was viable - who could think at that moment?! It had been his suggestion to wait, and they were *not* ready for a child.  
  
He'd put her in this situation. He'd married her; he's possibly gotten her pregnant. This was a mistake. He shouldn't have crumpled up that Military pamphlet; he shouldn't have listened to his heart. She would be so much better off right now, and afterward, when he'd come back from his duty, he could come back and make a better life for her.  
  
But he loved her, and his brain wasn't powerful enough to control his heart.  
  
**  
  
The talk went . . . fine. As fine as it could while Helen gasped on the phone and Rox felt like the epitome of a woman with loose morals. It ended in an insistence that Roxanne go to the family doctor and be fitted with birth control. So, they were two nervous women in a waiting room.  
  
"Mrs. Pryor?"  
  
Helen looked up before Roxanne did. She tugged on the younger woman's sleeve. "I'll go in too."  
  
Roxanne nodded, letting her mother-in-law follow her. Helen was worried sick, the rift between Jack and JJ was big enough - the fulfillment of his prediction would pull them even further apart. Besides that, she couldn't stop the thoughts that crossed her mind. She didn't want to be a grandmother now. She remembered her Nana Keller; she wore a wig, and had lost all of her teeth. She smelled like potatoes and licorice. *She* was still young . . . ish, she didn't want to have her child having a child now. Her very first baby.  
  
"Mrs. Pryor," Dr. Greller greeted. He had a white coat, a clipboard, and a warm smile. He'd taken care of their family for years and gotten to be close to them. Close enough to squeeze in an extra appointment for the Pryors. "How have you been? What seems to be the problem?"  
  
"It's not me," she said with a choked word and tight smile. "It's my daughter-in-law, Roxanne."  
  
Rox stepped forward with a shuffle and Dr. Greller's bushy eyebrows lifted in surprise. "Wasn't it just yesterday JJ was in for a physical?"  
  
"More like three months," Helen sighed.  
  
"And now he's married," he continued, taking the news in a far more positive light than everyone else did. "Isn't that funny? They grow up so fast these days."  
  
"Very fast," Helen agreed, less enthusiastically.  
  
"So what can I do to help the new member of the family?"  
  
Helen waited for Rox to respond, but got no sound. She spoke up instead. "She needs birth control. I was wondering if you could-"  
  
"Fine. Fine. I'll take care of it," he answered, scribbling a note for his nurse.  
  
"We'll also need a pregnancy test," Helen added. His head and eyebrow lifted at that, but he just nodded.  
  
"All right. I'll need to ask some questions."  
  
Rox nodded and finally broke away from Helen, not wanting her to witness any questions that might concern her sex life with JJ. "I can do this myself."  
  
Helen nodded and slipped out.  
  
"Roxanne, have a seat on the bed," the doctor said, finally reading from his clipboard - and the information Rox had filled out earlier. "You're sixteen?"  
  
She nodded, but he didn't continue with a negative comment. Dr. Greller had been in practice since WW2, when everyone one was scared, packing off to war, hardly out of high school, and marrying their young sweethearts because they needed to know there was something to come back to.  
  
"How long have you been married?"  
  
"A little over two months," she answered, climbing up.  
  
"And when was your last missed period?"  
  
"Actually," she said, clearing her throat. "I haven't missed anything. We . . . last night."  
  
"Your last period then?"  
  
"The twenty-second."  
  
"Okay. We can't do a test for weeks. Roxanne, does JJ know you're here?" It was a question he had to ask, it was the husband's place to choose. It was clear literature that came along with the new medical technology a few years back.  
  
"We both agreed it's too early for children," she said, shifting a little, annoyed that he had to ask that question and she was assumed unqualified to decide herself. Rox slumped back a little. "I . . . I asked Mrs. Pryor, but she wouldn't answer. Maybe you could . . ."  
  
He looked at her, setting his pen down. "Do you have questions, Roxanne?"  
  
"A few . . . How many times can you have sex without . . . help, before you get pregnant?"  
  
"You're worried, so I assume you think once is enough."  
  
"Is it?" she asked quietly.  
  
"Yes."  
  
Roxanne sunk in her seat.  
  
**  
  
She lay on the bed, looking up on the ceiling. She hadn't managed to get much done after Helen had brought her home. The doctor had explained the different options in detail. Among them the diaphragm, and the birth- control pill, she decided on the second. She had yet to take one; she couldn't until enough time had passed to have a pregnancy test performed. Until then, she had to use condoms, and hope for the best.  
  
But would it be so bad? She reached down to cup her stomach; it would be a little someone, a mix of her and JJ. She smiled in spite of herself. Those new school clothes wouldn't fit. She laughed to herself and got up, she had to clean, and look for a part-time job.  
  
She'd just finished the dishes when JJ came in. He wasn't covered in dirt, he'd been moving polished, cared-for antiques today - he was drenched in sweat.  
  
"Hi." He was unsure as he walked in, but Rox opened the refrigerator and pulled him out a Coke. Popping it open she set it on the counter.  
  
"Hi."  
  
He reached for the bottle with a curious look. "Still mad at me?"  
  
She sighed, looking at him and shrugging. "I don't know."  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
"I know," she answered. He came around the counter, reaching for her. She turned slowly, tilting her head back to kiss him. And, as it always did, doubts he had about marrying her melted away into her beautiful eyes.  
  
"I love you."  
  
"I love you," she said, kissing him again. "In case . . . if I'm not pregnant, I went and got some birth control pills today . . . Your mother took me."  
  
JJ was surprised, but nodded. "That was--"  
  
"Uncomfortable?" she smiled.  
  
"Yeah," he agreed, pulling her close and smiling against her hair.  
  
"But we'll have to wait a few weeks to find out."  
  
"We'll be okay. No matter what."  
  
"I go to a Catholic school, JJ."  
  
"Don't worry, our child will be just as discreet as we were."  
  
Smiling, Roxanne hugged her husband close. "That wouldn't be discreet at all." 


	5. NOTE

AUTHOR'S NOTE  
  
Before I go on to do more chapters I wanted to know if people were reading this. I like writing it, especially since there aren't many Roxanne/JJ stories out there, but I'm also doing several others. If you like this, or even if you're a casual reader, please review. If I don't get enough people who are interested, I don't think I'm going to continue this.  
  
Thank you. 


End file.
